Caellum finally arrived early in February (not on time, but not too late to make us worried that he might never come!). I was in denial that I was actually in labour up until a few hours before he was born. I really didn’t think it was happening, I had gotten used to being pregnant and just couldn’t imagine what it would be like having a newborn in my arms.
I was pretty ready for the birth part itself. I had read everything possible on childbirth and done all the courses. Enough that I nearly could have run a course myself!! And I had finally completed everything on my”to do list”, including things like rolling over my super and closing down old bank accounts (yes, I got down to the very bottom of the list – a place where you never usually make it too) so I thought I was ready as I was ever going to be.
I was probably a little less prepared for what being a mum actually meant, like most first time mums. You have perceptions of course, but then I’d only ever got an aunties glimpse into life with kids – and that’s never really the same. Unless you have had first hand experience it’s so hard to know what to expect, and even then, every baby is different.
To make it easier to understand for someone who has never had children it’s like having a job as a book publisher and then all of a sudden being reassigned a role as a flight traffic controller. This may sometimes result in moments of sheer panic. But little by little, day by day, you learn very quickly, (without too many accidents), with the help of the more experienced – until it becomes second nature… almost. I say almost as I’ve been told that children like to mix things up, keep you guessing and on your toes. Lucky they are super cute.
And my little one is pretty darn cute even if the only feature Sam tells me he got from me is my toes. Some nights I may only get two hours sleep (the night before last) and others you might get six (last night – whoo hoo!!) but it’s really funny what you can survive on.
And you learn all these great new skills like typing one handed while holding a nearly sleeping baby, how to get ready in 5 minutes (previously unheard of) and just how strong you can be.
I also have loved the support from others mums – those mums in the shops who tell me I’m doing a good job when my baby is screaming at the top of his lungs and those who give me advice at 2am when I need it the most. It’s like you become a part of a big community of people who understand and go out of their way to help you out.
And as all mums tell me – it just gets better and better. I know this is true – yesterday I got my first smile and it was priceless.